“Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking”oleh Susan Cain. Buku ini seperti cermin bagi seorang introvert, yang akan menunjukkan kekuatan dan kelemahan yangselama ini tidak disadari.
Berikut 12 Pelajaran yang bisa dipelajari buku “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking”
[1] Berhenti untuk berusaha menjadi extrovert, jadilah INTROVERT apa adanya.
“So stay true to your own nature. If you like to do things in a slow and steady way,don’t let others make you feel as if you have to race. If you enjoy depth, don’t force yourself to seek breadth.
If you prefer single-tasking to multitasking, stick to your guns. Being relatively unmoved by rewards gives you the incalculable power to go your own way. It’s up to you to use that independence to good effect.”
[2] Baik introvert maupun extrovert mempunyai kekuatan masing-masing. Kekuatan introvert diantaranya pantang menyerah dan konsentrasi. Gunakan kekuatan tersebut untuk melakukan apa yang penting bagi diri sendiri.
“The secret to life is to put yourself in the right lighting. For some it’s a Broadway spotlight; for others, a lamplit desk. Use your natural powers — of persistence, concentration, insight, and sensitivity — to do work you love and work that matters. Solve problems, make art, think deeply.”
[3] Introvert dicap ‘anti sosial’, so what? Introvert tidak perlu bersosialisasi dengan setiap orang, cukup hanya dengan teman dekat saja. Fokus ke kualitas dibanding kuantitas. 20% temanmu yang memberikan 80% kebahagianmu (Google konsep pareto)
“..don’t worry about socializing with everyone else. Relationships make everyone happier, introverts included, but think quality over quantity.”
[4] Introvert dan pemalu tidak sama.
“Shyness is the fear of social disapprovalor humiliation, while introversion is a preference for environments that are not overstimulating. Shyness is inherently painful; introversion is not”
[5] Extrovert dan introvert mempunyai metode pembelajaran yang berbeda.
“Balance teaching methods to serve all the kids in your class. Extroverts tend to like movement, stimulation, collaborative work. Introverts prefer lectures, downtime, and independent projects. Mix it up fairly.”
[6] Anak Introvert bukanlah cacat mental yang perlu diobati. Terima apa adanya dan bimbinglah dia.
“Don’t think of introversion as something that needs to be cured. If an introverted child needs help with social skills, teach her or recommend training outside class, just as you’d do for a student who needs extra attention in math or reading. But celebrate these kids for who they are.”
[7] Hasil penelitian membuktikan bahwa Introvert menyukai lingkungan yang bersahabat dan ramah, sedangkan ekstrovert menyukai lingkungan yang berkompetisi.
“These findings suggest something very important: introverts like people they meet in friendly contexts; extroverts prefer those they compete with….
…A very different study, in which robots interacted with stroke patients during physical rehabilitation exercises, yielded strikingly similar results.
…Introverted patients responded better and interacted longer with robots that were designed to speak in a soothing, gentle manner: “I know it is hard, but remember that it’s for your own good,” and, “Very nice, keep up the good work.
Extroverts, on the other hand, worked harder for robots that used more bracing, aggressive language: “You can do more than that, I know it!” and “Concentrate on your exercise!”
[8] Introvert mempunyai kemampuan untuk berperilaku seperti extrovert, SELAMA menyangkut hal yang dianggap penting. Introvert tidak ASBUN (asal bunyi), cukup bunyi sekali dan bermakna dalam. Introvert harus belajar mengungkapkan pendapat, tidak semua hal, melainkan cukup pada hal yang kamu yakinin itu penting.
“You might wonder how a strong introvertlike Professor Little manages to speak in public so effectively. The answer, he says, is simple….Free Trait Theory, we areborn and culturally endowed with certain personality traits — introversion, for example — but we can and do act out of character in the service of “core personal projects.
….In other words, introverts are capable of acting like extroverts for the sake of work they consider important, people theylove, or anything they value highly.”
[9] Apakah Introvert tidak bisa memberikan pendapat atau ide seperti layaknya extrovert? TIDAK!. Introvert bisa memberikanidenya, tetapi dengan caranya sendiri, salah satunya dengan cara menulis.
“Introverts need to trust their gut and share their ideas as powerfully as they can. This does not mean aping extroverts; ideas can be shared quietly, they can be communicated in writing, they can be packaged into highly produced lectures, they can be advanced by allies.
The trick for introverts is to honor their own styles instead of allowing themselves to be swept up by prevailing norms.”
[10] Introvert tidak tahan dengan stimulus ataupun informasi yang berlebihan seperti ekstrovert. Introvert menghabiskan ‘bandwidth’ nya untuk melihat atau observasi.
“Extroverts are better than introverts at handling information overload…. Introverts’ reflectiveness uses up a lot of cognitive capacity, according to Joseph Newman.
On any given task, he says, “if we have 100 percent cognitive capacity, an introvert may have only 75 percent on task and 25 percent off task, whereas an extrovert may have 90 percent on task.” This is because most tasks are goal-directed.
Extroverts appear to allocate most of their cognitive capacity to the goal at hand, while introverts use up capacity by monitoring how the task is going.”
[11] Hasil penelitian menunjukkan bahwa introvert lebih baik dari extrovert untuk tugassosial yang membutuhkan kegigihan.
“Introverts sometimes outperform extroverts even on social tasks that require persistence. Wharton management professor Adam Grant, once studied the personality traits of effective call-center employees.
Grant predicted that the extroverts would be better telemarketers, but it turned out that there was zero correlation between extroversion levels and cold-calling prowess. “The extroverts would make these wonderful calls,” Grant told me, “but then a shiny object of some kind would cross their paths and they’d lose focus.”
The introverts, in contrast, “would talk very quietly, but boom, boom, boom, they were making those calls. They were focused and determined.” The only extroverts to outperform them were thosewho also happened to be unusually high scorers for a separate personality trait measuring conscientiousness.”
[12] Hasil Penelitian Professor Adam Grant, menunjukkan bahwa pemimpin introvert akan lebih efektif apabila memimpin orang-orang yang proaktif dibandingkan pasif. Sedangkan pemimpin extrovert dapat memimpin orang-orang pasif dengan lebih baik.
“Grant says it makes sense that introvertsare uniquely good at leading initiative-takers. Because of their inclination to listen to others and lack of interest in dominating social situations, introverts are more likely to hear and implement suggestions. Having benefited from the talents of their followers, they are then likely to motivate them to be even more proactive.
Introverted leaders create a virtuous circle of proactivity, in other words. In the T-shirt-folding study, the team members reported perceiving the introverted leaders as more open and receptive to their ideas, which motivated them to workharder and to fold more shirts.
Extroverts, on the other hand, can be so intent on putting their own stamp on events that they risk losing others’ good ideas along the way and allowing workersto lapse into passivity. “Often the leaders end up doing a lot of the talking,” says Francesca Gino, “and not listening to any of the ideas that the followers are trying to provide.”
But with their natural ability to inspire, extroverted leaders are better at getting results from more passive workers.”
Dengan membaca buku ini seperti membacapeta medan perang yang menunjukkan bagian yang aman, bagian musuh atau bagian yang berbahaya atau daerah penuh ranjau. Dengan begitu, kita telah dipersiapkan bekal yang cukup untuk maju ke medan perang.
Tetapi dengan membaca peta tidaklah cukup….Kita harus menyesuaikan dan membiasakan diri di medan perang tersebut.
Semoga bermanfaat
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